I’ve only ever had one spa day. It was on holiday with my family in Mauritius about 11 years ago. My mum twisted my arm to go and have my first “grown up” massage and whilst I don’t remember it all that well, I remember the combination of full body massage and sunburn was far from relaxing.
This year, I decided it was time to give the spa thing another whirl (this time without skin that was red raw from the sun) and recruited Fran, one of my fave gal pals, to join me. We decided to spoil ourselves with a visit to Luton Hoo. *Dork alert* – going there has been on my to-do list ever since I watched a programme presented by good ol’ Alan Titchmarsh about the history behind their Capability Brown-designed gardens. I am 27 going on 50, I know.
Stately homes and historic houses make my heart boom and I’m pretty certain that the 19th century and I would’ve been great friends. Coming up the Downton Abbey-like driveway would’ve probably had more impact if we had been traveling on horse & cart instead of my Ford Fiesta (with One Direction booming out the speakers) but it was pretty spectacular nonetheless. We headed straight to the spa for a swim & sweat session before a delicious 55min deep tissue massage. Note to self: next time avoid drinking copious cups of
swanky tea before a massage to avoid desperately needing to pee halfway through.
One thing to note about Luton Hoo. Whilst absolutely beautiful, the pool was filled with middle-aged couples basically dry humping their way round the spa facilities, something I kindly reported via my Snapchat story of the trip. People – you’re staying in a hotel, just save it for the bedroom. In between giving them all death stares, I kicked back with Aziz Ansari’s Modern Romance – which had me seriously lol’ing at just how accurately he’s portrayed the hell that is dating today.
When Fran and I get together, we drink a lot. Every time. This was no exception. So after a day of extreme healthiness, we figured it was a good idea to drink a couple of bottles of prosecco before getting dolled up for dinner. We opted to dine in their dinner Wernher restaurant in the main house. The restaurant room was every blogger’s wet dream – marble walls. I repeat. MARBLE WALLS. It was proper fancy – cloches over the food and everything!
I woke up with (unsurprisingly) a banging headache so the morning was a struggle. After several coffees, a bath and breakfast (which was disappointingly very average), I was back on track to get my spa game on again. I kicked back with the Sunday Times and embarked on a rotation between the jacuzzi, sauna and steam room. If every Sunday was like that, I would be one very zen chick. Before hitting the road back to London we had a gander round the B-E-A-U-T-I-F-U-L gardens. I kept waiting for Mr Darcy to ride up on his handsome white horse but alas he didn’t show up. Rude.
I wrote a TripAdvisor review of Luton Hoo for anyone who’s thinking of visiting. The biggest takeaway of the weekend, is the need to do it all over again. Anyone who’s looking for a spa buddy or has recommendations of where I should visit next, holler at me.